【读书笔记】王尔德《自深深处》16
1891年，处在写作生涯巅峰期的王尔德遇见了阿尔弗雷德·“波西”·道格拉斯(Alfred "Bosie" Douglas)，两人很快成为了同性恋人。四年后，因为这段“不敢说出名字的爱”，王尔德 被判“有伤风化”罪而入狱。在狱中，王尔德开始反思从前的生活，思索痛苦和人生的意义，艺术和爱的真谛 ，最终将那些痛苦的泪水都化作优美而深沉的文字，写成了这封名为"de profundis"(从深处)的长信。
作者简介：奥斯卡·王尔德(Oscar Wilde, 1854-1900)，英国维多利亚时代著名作家， “唯美主义运动”的领军人物，倡导“为艺术而艺术”(Art for art's sake)。他的代表作有 戏剧《莎乐美》(Salome)《认真的重要性》(The Importance of Being Earnest)，童话《快乐王子》(The Happy Prince) 《夜莺与玫瑰》(The Nightingale and the Rose)，小说《道连·格雷的画像》(The Picture of Dorian Gray)， 以及书信《自深深处》(De Profundis)等。
【原著选段】
Of course you had your illusions, lived in them indeed, and through their shifting mists and coloured veils saw all things changed. You thought, I remember quite well, that your devoting yourself to me, to the entire exclusion of your family and family life, was a proof of your wonderful appreciation of me, and your great affection. No doubt to you it seemed so. But recollect that with me was luxury, high living, unlimited pleasure, money without stint.
I also had my illusions. I thought life was going to be a brilliant comedy, and that you were to be one of many graceful figures in it. I found it to be a revolting and repellent tragedy, and that the sinister occasion of the great catastrophe, sinister in its concentration of aim and intensity of narrowed willpower, was yourself, stripped of that mask of joy and pleasure by which you, no less than I, had been deceived and led astray.
【朱纯深译本】
当然，你有你的幻想，说实在是生活在这些幻想中。透过那游移的薄雾、有色的薄纱， 一切全看走样了。我记得很清楚， 你以为一心一意与我相伴，将你的家庭和家庭生活置之度外，便证明了你对我美妙的欣赏和深厚的情谊。在你看来无疑是如此。但是追忆当时，与我相伴便是奢侈，便是高雅生活， 便是无限的欢娱、不尽的金钱。
我呢，也有我的幻想。我以为生活会是一出绝妙的喜剧，而你会是剧中一个风雅备至的人物。后来却发现它原来是一个令人反感、令人恶心的悲剧。而带来大灾难的险恶祸端，其险其恶在于苦心孤诣、志在必得，就是剥去了欢娱和喜乐面具的你本人。那面具不但骗了我，也骗了你误入歧途。
【读书笔记】
1、illusion n.错觉，幻觉；幻想，错误的观念；(使观众产生错觉的)魔术手法，幻术
【举例】The old man's ruddy complexion gave an illusion of good health. 老人红润的脸色给人以健康的错觉。
have illusions about sth. 对某事抱有幻想
【相关词汇】
illusionary a.造成错觉的；错觉/幻想中的
illusionist n.好幻想的人，空想家；魔术师
disillusion v.使醒悟；使幻灭 be disillusioned about sb./sth. 对某人/某事不再抱有幻想
2、recollect 回忆，追忆；想起
【举例】I'm trying to recollect his phone number. 我正努力回想他的电话号码。
I cannot recollect what happened next. 这以后发生的事我记不得了。
【相关词汇】
recollection 回忆，记忆；往事；回忆录 It is in my recollection that.... 我记得……
3、sinister 恶意的；不祥的；灾难性的；左边的
【举例】a sinister remark 恶毒的话
a sinister smile 奸笑
a sinister symptom 凶兆
a sinister fate 厄运
【词源探秘】
为神马一个表示“凶险”的单词还有“左边”的意思呢？原因是这个词来自拉丁语Sinistra，本意是“左边”，而古罗马占卜官视左侧出现的征兆为不祥，久而久之，这个词也就带上“不祥”的意思了。