The supermarket card aisle is the best place to find the most cloying poetic mush you'll ever read. The problem is, your dad already knows that he lovingly taught you / The lessons you would later need / And his wisdom helped shape / The life you would later lead. Probably. Actually, maybe you've never had a thorough discussion about how you really, truly feel. But that's fine. Don't start now.
1.Father's Day is simple.
Hi dad. I got you a card.
2.All you need to do is send a nice card ...Like this one ...
——Dad, you are my father.
3.To let Dad know you appreciate him ...
——Dad, thanks for the taxi service.
4. And the stuff he's done for you.
——FACT: The average father will kill 9680 spiders in his lifetime.
5.Especially if you were a horrible kid ...
Remember my teenage years?
6.Or if you still are!
——Dad, you will always be my ATM.
——Dad, you are my favorite laundry folder.
8. And there's certainly a reason to celebrate.
——Dad, I puggin' love you.
8.Despite your lack of gushy sentiment, Father's Day is nice.
——I love you, Dad.
But we don't have to talk about it.
10.So give Dad a call. Take him to dinner. Talk about the weather, or his parenting skills ...
——I promise I didn't use your money to buy you this card.