The Grammys has already served up their nominees in lump of coal style.Here are the categories, with predicted winners in the text.

Album of the Year

Morning Phase – Beck
Beyoncé – Beyoncé
x – Ed Sheeran
In the Lonely Hour – Sam Smith
G I R L – Pharrell Williams

Note: Taylor Swift’s 1989 came out after the STUPID cutoff date of October 1st, so it isn’t eligible until next year’s Grammy’s. It would be a runaway win for her otherwise.

Double note: “Shake It Off” was released as a single before that cutoff, so it IS eligible this year.

Record of the Year

“Fancy” – Iggy Azalea featuring Charli XCX
“Chandelier” – Sia
“Stay with Me” (Darkchild Version) – Sam Smith
“Shake It Off” – Taylor Swift
“All About That Bass” – Meghan Trainor

Note: First, Sam Smith is the hot, new artist with some legitimate talent that makes old-ish style, traditional music that the Grammy committee will latch onto (PUN VICTORY!) for his entire career.. Taylor Swift is a million-record selling, established powerhouse primed to win Grammys yearly.

Song of the Year

“All About That Bass” – Meghan Trainor
“Chandelier” – Sia
“Shake It Off” – Taylor Swift
“Stay with Me” (Darkchild Version) – Sam Smith
“Take Me to Church” – Hozier

Note: “All About that Bass” scares me a ton,because it’s the kind of song that would sneak this win. For my sanity, I’m going to rule it out, but I won’t be surprised at all if it wins. This one comes down to Swift, Smith, and Sia , and because of the next award, I think they spread the love and give it to Sia.

Best New Artist

Sam Smith
Iggy Azalea
Brandy Clark

Note: Does anyone other the Sam Smith make sense? No. Ok, Sam Smith is winning.

Best Pop Solo Performance

“All of Me (Live)” – John Legend
“Chandelier” – Sia
“Stay with Me” (Darkchild Version) – Sam Smith
“Shake It Off” – Taylor Swift
“Happy (Live)” – Pharrell Williams

Note: There are so many overlapping Grammy trends here, you can’t sort it. The hot new artist, the actually performed well song, many established Grammy approved artists, live performances of previous Grammy-winning songs, etc. Ugh. Please give it to Sam Smith.

Best Pop Duo/Group Performance

“Fancy” – Iggy Azalea feat. Charli XCX
“A Sky Full of Stars” – Coldplay 
“Say Something” – A Great Big World and Christina Aguilera
“Bang Bang” – Jessie J, Ariana Grande, & Nicki Minaj
“Dark Horse” – Katy Perry feat. Juicy J

Note: Logically, “Fancy” picks up the win here, as it’s nominated for Record of the Year, but logic isn’t something the academy likes all that much. Watch for a Coldplay upset.

Best Pop Vocal Album

Ghost Stories – Coldplay
Bangerz – Miley Cyrus
My Everything – Ariana Grande
Prism – Katy Perry
x – Ed Sheeran
In the Lonely Hour – Sam Smith

Note: The committee might as well feel responsible for pushing the less successful, lesser known artist more sales, and hand this one to In the Lonely Hour and Sam Smith.

Best Dance Recording

“Never Say Never” – Basement Jaxx
“Rather Be” – Clean Bandit feat. Jess Glynne
“F For You” – Disclosure feat. Mary J. Blige
“I Got U” – Duke Dumont feat. Jax Jones
“Faded” – Zhu

Note: Based on the Grammy tradition of awarding remade songs from years past and re-awarding long-time established artist, look for Disclosure and Mary J Blige to take this one.

Best Dance/Electronic Album

Syro – Aphex Twin
While (1<2) – Deadmau5
Nabuma Rubberband – Little Dragon
Do It Again – Royksopp & Robyn
Damage Control – Mat Zo

Note: This is an eclectic bunch of albums. I don’t think the voters have much love for Aphex Twin, despite it being the best album on this list. I imagine Deadmau5 will win, since he’s the only artist here that would care about it.

Best Rock Performance

“Gimme Something Good” – Ryan Adams
“Do I Wanna Know?” – Arctic Monkeys
“Blue Moon” – Beck
“Fever” – The Black Keys
“Lazaretto” – Jack White

Note: All these songs, save Arctic Monkeys’, are nominated for Best Rock Song too, so that doesn’t help clarify anything. So is it going to be a BlackKeys or Jack White kind of year?

Best Metal Performance

“Neon Knights” – Anthrax
“High Road” – Mastodon
“Heartbreaker” – Motorhead
“THe Negative One” – Slipknot
“The Last in Line” – Tenacious D

Note: Anthrax has been nominated every year since 2007. The winner in 2006? Slipknot. The winner in 2005? Motorhead. Mastodon has been nominated a ton, but has never won. It comes down to Motorhead and Slipknot, and I think the latter is more the academy’s view on metal’s preference.
注:炭疽乐队自2007年以来每年都会获得提名。2006年的赢家是谁?Slipknot。2005年的赢家是谁?乳齿象乐队无数次获得提名,但是从来没有获奖过。那么获奖者应该在Motorhead 和Slipknot两者之间,我觉得后者更符合评委会对金属音乐的眼光和偏好。

Best Rock Song

“Ain’t It Fun” – Paramore
“Blue Moon” – Beck
“Fever” – The Black Keys
“Gimme Something Good” – Ryan Adams
“Lazaretto” – Jack White

Note: Beck being nominated for Album of the Year confuses things more. I’m going to stick with my Jack White clean sweep.

Best Rock Album

Ryan Adams – Ryan Adams
Morning Phase – Beck
Turn Blue – The Black Keys
Hypnotic Eye – Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
Songs of Innocence – U2

Note: Again, logic dictates a Beck win, and that’s what I’m going with, but someone else winning wouldn’t surprise me at all.

Best Alternative Music Album

This Is All Yours – alt-J
Reflektor – Arcade Fire
Melophobia – Cage the Elephant
St. Vincent – St. Vincent
Lazaretto – Jack White

Note: That sneaky Jack White; he entered his rock album in a different category! Sly devil. You earn yourself a win for that!

Best R&B Performance

“Drunk in Love” – Beyoncé feat. Jay Z
“New Flame” – Chris Brown feat. Usher & Rick Ross
“It’s Your World” – Jennifer Hudson feat. R Kelly
“Like THis” – Ledisi
“Good Kisser” – Usher

Note: A Jennifer Hudson/R Kelly combo is intriguing, but I think Beyoncé takes this

Best R&B Song

“Drunk In Love” – Beyoncé feat. Jay Z
“Good Kisser” – Usher
“New Flame” – Chris Brown feat. Usher & Rick Ross
“Options (Wolfjames Version)” – Luke James feat. Rick Ross)
“The Worst” – Jhene Aiko

Note: Fill up that trophy case, Beyoncé!

Best Rap Performance

“3005” – Childish Gambino
“0 to 100 / The Catch Up” – Drake
“Rap God” – Eminem
“I” – Kendrick Lamar
“All I Need Is You” – Lecrae

Note: By Grammy standards, it’s Eminem versus nobody, so Eminem wins.

Best Rap/Sung Collaboration

“Blak Majik” – Common feat. Jhene Aiko
“The Monster” – Eminem & Rihanna
“Tuesday” – I Love Makonnen feat. Drake
“Studio” – Schoolboy Q feat. BJ the Chicago Kid
“Bound 2″ – Kanye West & Charlie Wilson

Note: Well, at least this one has competition: Eminem’s legacy versus Kanye’s. Eminem gets a step up because of Rihanna’s inclusion, though Bound 2 made the bigger splash via its ridiculous music video.
注:好吧,还好这个奖项上有点竞争性:这是阿姆的权威性与卡内的权威性之间的较量。阿姆由于蕾哈娜的加盟更胜一筹,虽然Bound 2 滑稽的音乐视频得到了更多的关注。

Best Rap Song

“Anaconda” – Nicki Minaj
“Bound 2″ – Kanye West & Charlie Wilson
“I” – Kendrick Lamar
“We Dem Boyz” – Wiz Khalifa
“0 to 100 / The Catch Up” – Drake

Note: Here’s the thing: if I don’t know rap, the Grammy’s sure don’t know rap. Wiz Khalifa wins.
注:事实是这样的:如果我不了解说唱音乐的话,格莱美奖就更不了解说唱音乐了。Wiz Khalifa 肯定会赢。

Best Rap Album

The New Classic – Iggy Azalea
Because the Internet – Childish Gambino
Nobody’s Smiling – Common
The Marshall Mathers LP 2 – Eminem
Oxymoron – ScHoolboy Q
Blacc Hollywood – Wiz Khalifa

Note: Last year, this category was Kendrick Lamar, Kanye West, Drake, Jay Z, and Macklemore & Ryan Lewis (one of these things is not like the other…. and was the winner). We have, if I put it lightly, a slight downgrade this year.
注:去年这一奖项的角逐者包括Kendrick Lamar, Kanye West, Drake, Jay Z和 Macklemore & Ryan Lewis (由于与其他候选者都不同,最终获奖)。委婉的说,今年的参赛者质量有所下滑。

Best Urban Contemporary Album

Sail Out – Jhené Aiko
Beyoncé – Beyoncé
X – Chris Brown
Mali is… – Mali Music
G I R L – Pharrell Williams

Note: Welcome to the world as ruled by Beyoncé. No one else is even going to sniff this award.

Best Country Solo Performance

“Give Me Back My Hometown” – Eric Church
“Invisible” – Hunter Hayes
“Automatic” – Miranda Lambert
“Something in the Water” – Carrie Underwood
“Cop Car” – Keith Urban

Note: If I know the Grammy’s, they like Underwood and Lambert a lot, so I’m picking Eric Church.
注:如果我对格莱美的了解是正确的话,他们非常喜欢Underwood和Lambert ,所以我还是猜Eric Church或赢吧。

Best Country Song

“American Kids” – Kenny Chesney
“Automatic” – Miranda Lambert
“Give Me Back My Hometown” – Eric Church
“I’m Not Gonna Miss You” – Glen Campbell
“Meanwhile Back at Mama’s” – Tim McGraw featuring Faith Hill

Note: Shouldn’t Tim McGraw be dueting with Nelly or LL Cool J or something? And isn’t Faith Hill retired after her Sunday Night Football gig? Whatever, Eric Church wins again.
注:Tim McGraw 为什么没有跟Nelly 或者 LL Cool J来个二重唱呢?Faith Hill 不是在她的《周日足球夜》之后就退出歌坛了吗?无论如何,应该又是埃里克·丘奇赢了。

Best Country Duo/Group Performance

“Gentle on my Mind” – The Band Perry

“Something Bad” – Miranda Lambert with Carrie Underwood
“Day Drinking” – Little Big Town
“Meanwhile Back At Mama’s” – Time McGraw feat. Faith Hill
“Raise ‘Em Up” – Keith Urban feat. Eric Church

Note: Nobody wins in this category, but Lambert and Underwood together combine to be the least-loser.

Best Country Album

Riser – Dierks Bentley
The Outsiders – Eric Church
12 Stories – Brandy Clark
Platinum – Miranda Lambert
The Way I’m Livin’ – Lee Ann Womack

Note: EVERYONE’S A WINNER! Eric Church, collect your prize!

Best Comedy Album

Mandatory Fun – Weird Al Yankovic
obsessed – Jim Gaffigan
Oh My God – Louis CK
Tragedy Plus Comedy Equals Time – Patton Oswalt
We Are Miracles – Sarah Silverman

Note: Weird Al’s genius marketing and good album should lock up this award for him.
注:Weird Al卓有成效的宣传策略和这张专辑的质量确保了他会获得此奖。

Best Song Written for Visual Media

“Everything Is Awesome!!!” – Tegan and Sara feat. The Lonely Island (Lego Movie)
“I See Fire” – Ed Sheeran (The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug)
“I’m Not gonna Miss You” – Glen Campbell (Glen Campbell, I’ll Be me)
“Let It Go” – Idina Menzel (Frozen)
“The Moon Song” – Scarlett Johansson & Joaquin Phoenix (Her)

Note: It has to be Frozen, right? As much fun as a Lego Movie song winning, it won’t beat out the most popular song for humans under the age of 16 in a decade.

Best Music Video

“We Exist” – Arcade Fire
“Turn Down For What” – DJ Snake & Lil Jon
“Chandelier” – Sia
“Happy” – Pharrell Williams
“The Golden Age” – Woodkid feat. Max Richter

Note: Nothing would make me happy than that if it is the video for “Turn Down For What” to win, but it’s probably going to “Chandelier.”
注:假如Turn Down For What的音乐录音带能赢,我会感到莫大的快意,不过获胜的很可能还是《尚德利耶》。