朋友Friends

巴金Ba Jin

| 译文摘自张培基《英译中国散文选一》

这一次的旅行使我更了解一个名词的意义,这个名词就是:朋友。

七八天以前我曾对一个初次见面的朋友说:“在朋友们面前我只感到惭愧。你们待我太好了,我简直没法报答你们。”这并不是谦虚的客气话,这是真的事实。说过这些话,我第二天就离开了那个朋友,并不知道以后还有没有机会再见他。但是他给我的那一点点温暖至今还使我的心颤动。

On my recent travels, I came to realize still more fully the significance of the word “friend”.
Seven or eight days ago, I said to a friend whom I had just come to know, “I can’t help feeling embarrassed before my friends. You’re all so nice to me. I simply don’t know how to repay your kindness.” I did not make this remark out of mere modesty and courtesy. I truly meant what I said. The next day, I said goodbye to this friend, not knowing if I could ever see him again. But the little warmth that he gave me has been keeping my heart throbbing with gratitude.

要点:
1,在翻译“这一次的旅行使我更了解一个名词的意义”时,译者再一次无情地抛弃了我们最常用的make君,将“我”作为主语,串联起整个句子,fully realize意为“充分理解”,still 在此的作用是加强比较级,意为“还要,更”没错我们的行文奏是这么有感情~
2,“在朋友们面前我只感到惭愧”中的“惭愧”意为“不好意思”而不是”“羞愧”,因此译为embarrassed,此外还有ill at ease也可表示此意。
3,“谦虚的客气话”= out of mere modesty and courtesy
4,“使我的心颤动”译为keeping my heart throbbing(跳动,抽动,悸动) with gratitude,其中with gratitude是增加成分哦,原文虽然没有明说,但是有这个意思,因此,文学翻译时,作者的言外之意也是非常重要滴,就像是高中时做的阅读理解~\(^o^)/~

综述:文章开篇并没有很复杂的句式,翻译时注意揣测作者的真实语气~

我的生命大概不会很长久罢。然而在短促的过去的回顾中却有一盏明灯,照彻了我的灵魂的黑暗,使我的生存有一点光彩。这盏灯就是就友情。我应该感谢它,因为靠了它我才能够活到现在;而且把旧家庭给我留下的阴影扫除了的也正是它。
The length of my days will not be unlimited. However, whenever I look back on my brief past life, I find a beacon illuminating my soul and thereby lending a little brightness to my being. That beacon is friendship. I should be grateful to it because it has helped me keep alive up to now and clear away the shadow left on me by my old family.

要点:
1,“在短促的过去的回顾中”=在我回顾自己短暂的一生时,译为whenever I look back on my brief past life,其中look back on意为“回顾,回首”,此外它的小伙伴in retrospect(回顾过去)出镜率也很高,因为这个词在文学翻译中灰常常见哦,毕竟有一种文叫“回忆性散文”嘛~
2,lend to常见意为“借给,贷款给…”此处表示“增添,添加;赋予…以…”
3,being在此意为“诞生,存在,出现”,如We do not know when the universe came into being.我们不知道宇宙何时开始存在。
4,“靠了它我才能够活到现在;而且把旧家庭给我留下的阴影扫除了的也正是它”句中,两个分句都出现了“它”可考虑串成一个句子,避免it重复出现。译为it has helped me keep alive up to now and clear away the shadow left on me by my old family.在说法上,将“靠了它我才…”转换为“它帮助我,,,”

综述:文学语言区别于日常口语的便是它的用词,本段illuminating,grateful都是要好好借鉴和积累的对象哦~

世间有不少的人为了家庭抛弃朋友,至少也会在家庭和朋友之间划一个界限,把家庭看得比朋友重过若干倍。这似乎是很自然的事情。我也曾亲眼看见一些人结婚以后就离开朋友,离开事业……
Many people forsake their friends in favor of their own families, or at least draw a line of demarcation between families and friends, considering the former to be many times more important than the latter. That seems to be a matter of course. I have also seen with my own eyes how some people abandon their friends as well as their own careers soon after they get married…

要点:
1,“抛弃”的高级说法=forsake, leave 也是一个很文艺的说法,此外还有我们熟悉的abandon~
2, in favor of 意为“支持,赞同”但是,do sth in favor of sth 就有“决定选择某物而不选择某物”之意了~如:Plans for a tunnel were rejected in favor of a bridge.(修建隧道的计划被否决,选择了桥)
Favor的其他用法,也要引起重视~,常见的有come back in favor(重获青睐),in sb’s favor (对某人有利),do sb no favors=don’t do sb any favor (对…没有一点好处),do sb a favor(帮某人忙)
3,“把家庭看得比朋友重过若干倍”译为considering the former to be many times more important than the latter,此处注意倍数的表达“数量+比较级+than”~而且译者用former 和latter,避免了“家庭,朋友”这两个词的重复出现,体现了英文多代词的特点~

综述:本段主要体会“英多代(词),汉少代(词)”的特点,并且注意倍数的表示法~

朋友是暂时的,家庭是永久的。在好些人的行为里我发见了这个信条。这个信条在我实在是不可理解的。对于我,要是没有朋友,我现在会变成怎样可怜的东西,我自己也不知道。
Friends are transient whereas family are lasting—that is the tenet, as I know, guiding the behavior of many people. To me, that is utterly inconceivable. Without friends, I would have been reduced to I don’t know what a miserable creature.

要点:
1,说一下高级的转折词whereas,意为“鉴于,然而,反之”多用于正式文体哦,写作中也常会用到~如:He said Kyoto was about setting a framework, whereas Copenhagen is an attempt to get every country involved.
他说京都是建立一个框架,而哥本哈根是力图使每个国家都参与进来。
2,“要是没有朋友,我现在会变成怎样可怜的东西,我自己也不知道。”译为Without friends, I would have been reduced to I don’t know what a miserable creature.其中又出现了reduce啊有木有,从《背影》的“reduced circumstances(光景惨淡)”到《我坐了木船》的“reduce to(被迫从事)”再到如今的be reduced to(沦落为,沦落到),reduce在表示“落魄”和“惨”方面的伟大作用真是无可替代~~~
3,句法上注意最后一句,翻译时要用虚拟语气~表示对现在的虚拟,中文对时态要求并不明显,但在英文中要明确地体现出来

综述:注意虚拟语气虚拟语气虚拟语气~以及老朋友reduce 的用法

然而朋友们把我救了。他们给了我家庭所不能给的东西。他们的友爱,他们的帮助,他们的鼓励,几次把我从深渊的边沿救回来。他们对我表示了无限的慷慨。
Friends are my saviors. They give me things which it is beyond my family to give me. Thanks to their fraternal love, assistance and encouragement, I have time and again been saved from falling into an abyss while on its verge. They have been enormously generous towards me.

要点:
1,fraternal 意为“兄弟般的,兄弟间的”,同义的还有brotherly, friendly ,sibling~
2,“他们给了我家庭所不能给的东西”译为They give me things which it is beyond my family to give me. 其中which it is beyond my family to give是定语从句,修饰things,而which这个关系代词又是to give 的宾语,to give which又是真正的主语,it 是形式主语。其实这句话可以写成两个句子:①They give me things 。②To give the things is beyond my family .注意此处beyond 君在这里又粗现啦~还记得《我坐了木船》中表示“不能做某事”的用法吗?
2,“几次把我从深渊的边沿救回来”译为I have time and again been saved from falling into an abyss while on its verge,译者增译了动词(坠入深渊)使行文更加明确,很好地体现了把原文中的修辞意~值得借鉴和学习
3,time and again=再次,多次,之前也有过相关说法的总结,如:again and again, time after time, repeatedly~
3,“他们对我表示了无限的慷慨。”中“无限的慷慨”译为enormously generous,其中enormously=extremely, exceedingly(非常,极其)~

综述:本段对于“他们给了我家庭所不能给的东西”的翻译比较难理解,实在梳不通就按普通人翻译的They give me things that is beyond my family to give来理解~

我的生活曾经是悲苦的,黑暗的。然而朋友们把多量的同情,多量的爱,多量的欢乐,多量的眼泪分了给我,这些东西都是生存所必需的。这些不要报答的慷慨的施舍,使我的生活里也有了温暖,有了幸福。我默默地接受了它们。我并不曾说一句感激的话,我也没有做过一件报答的行为。但是朋友们却不把自私的形容词加到我的身上。对于我,他们太慷慨了。
There was a time when my life was miserable and gloomy. My friends then gave me in large quantities sympathy, love, joy and tears—things essential for existence. It is due to their bountiful free gifts that I also have my share of warmth and happiness in my life. I accepted their kindnesses quietly without ever saying a word of thanks and without ever doing anything in return. In spite of that, my friends never used the epithet “self-centered” when referred to me. They are only too generous towards me.

要点:
1,“多量的”就是大量的,此处译为In large quantity,如:we will order in large quantity man's shirts.(我们将大量订购男式衬衫)
童鞋们~是时候摆脱a lot of了
2,“这些不要报答的慷慨的施舍,使我的生活里也有了温暖,有了幸福”译为It is due to their bountiful free gifts that I also have my share of warmth and happiness in my life.运用强调句,说明正是这些朋友慷慨的帮助,才让我的生活发生了变化。my share of意为“我(也有)的一份”用以表达原文中“也”的内涵
3,经过本段,我们大概可以给这篇文章的高频词“慷慨”做一个总结了——generous, bountiful,本段“慷慨”以名词形式出现时意思接近于“礼物,馈赠”,因此译者翻译为了gift~联系上下文语境是灰常重要的!!!
4,本段那些用于加强语气的副词也值得积累,比如ever(用于否定句表不曾),还有之后会出现的only too(很,非常)=all too(非常,简直太。。。)如: I shall be only too pleased to hear from you further.我非常欢迎你再来信。

综述:总结“慷慨”的相关词汇,注意本段出现的副词同志们~

声明:本双语文章的中文评析系沪江英语原创内容,转载请注明出处。中文评析仅代表作者个人观点,仅供参考。如有不妥之处,欢迎指正。