大家好，这是沪江剑桥商务英语网针对沪江网友在BEC写作中所遇到的棘手问题而新设的一个作文辅导栏目。每期栏目我们都会邀请到BEC名师对沪江论坛BEC版块的网友作文进行评点，为各位同学在BEC的考试准备中助你一臂之力。

想让名师评点你的作文吗？请订阅BEC写作类节目：BEC作文辅导

本期BEC名师：昂立BEC项目部主任张梦琳老师，担纲商务英语听说、企业团训听说主讲,曾在知名企业担纲首席口译。从事听说教学十年之久，最乐意与同学分享职场经历，她的教学理念是：Enjoy learning English in the rest of your life!

本期作文题目：

You are the manager of a small office. In order to reduce costs and improve the company's environmental practices, you have decided to collect and recycle all paper used in the office.

Write a memo of 40-50 words:

informing staff of the new policy.
explaining how the paper will be collected
requesting staff to co-operate with the scheme.

参考作文：

Sample 48 words

TO: All staff
From: Paul Blake

Please note that from next Monday we are introducing an environmentally friendly scheme. All used paper from the office will be recycled. Used sheets should be placed in the green bin next to the photocopier for collection. All staff ate asked for their full cooperation with this scheme.

>>>> 白领口语提升计划>>>

网友作文一：

TO:All staff
FROM:Manager
RE:recycle paper policy

In order to reduce costs and improve our company's environmental practices,I decide to[1] collect and recycle all paper used in the shoud place your paper in the green box near the fountain before 6 pm on friday,we will recycle them once a week.
Cooperate please[2].

_________________________________________
[1]你不是公司的助理或者负责清洁的吧？怎么自己去collect paper? 改为：it is decided to ....
[2]这句话应该放在上面一段的最尾。不是please, 而是we need your cooperation.

网友作文二：

To: All staff
From: Mr. Za

Here is the new policy aim to[1] reduction the costs[2] and improvement of the environmental practices of our company. Used paper in this office, on effect of this policy, should be collected by one appointed clerk each day for recycle use by selling them to recycle bin for a profit. [3] Please cooperate with this policy for our own good and each one will serve the duty in turn. [4]
Thank you

_________________________________________
[1]结构问题，后面应该是分词做定语或状语，改为：aiming to
[2]反了，应该是：cost reduction 另外，aim to 是个动词词组，to 是介词么？ 后面应该是动词词组。
[3]公司要靠卖废品来取得利润么？这句话说得可是太掉价了。去掉吧。
[4]去掉。

背景补遗：

1.什么是BEC（剑桥商务英语考试）？
2.学习BEC需具备什么样的基础？
3.如果准备考BEC，有哪些书籍参考呢？
4.沪江有相应的BEC学习小组吗？
5.BEC在沪江有哪些节目推荐呢？
6.2009年BEC考试报名日期是多久？
7.报考前我想做做SuperBEC商务口语测试>>