二、给真爱追寻者的信

We must begin with your personal definition of TRUE LOVE. Without that, your search is pointless as the roundabout with no feasible exit for your journey. Don’t race to the dictionary, as the definition lies within your own life philosophy and experience.

我们必须从你们个人对真爱的定义开始。没了它，你的寻求便毫无意义，如同环形绕道的旅途没有出口可走。不要去查字典，因为这定义就在你的人生哲学和经历之中。

Our adult happiness lies rooted in the soil of our childhood. Instinctively, we bonded to our mothers for survival and eventually understood the protective potential of our fathers. All can agree that our basis of love stems from these early interactions. Rather than bandy about the countless theories concerning “mommy” and “daddy” issues, let’s begin with the idea that you have come to terms with your past and are eager to move forward into your own loving relationship.

我们作为成人的幸福，植根于孩提时的土壤。为求生存，我们本能地和妈妈亲近，而后终于懂得了父亲对我们的保护。大家都知道，我们的爱，来源于这些早期的互动。与其散播关于“妈咪”和“爸比”问题的无数理论，不如让我们以这样的想法开始：你已经能够和自己的过去共处，并且渴望前进步入你自己爱的关系。

The best predictor of one’s future behavior is to look at past behavior. By looking at your actions, can you say that you’ve fallen in love with the most important person…yourself? Without arrogance and hubris, do you LOVE the person you have become?

预测一个人未来行为的最好方法，就是去看其过去的行为。回顾你的行动，你可以说自己已经爱上了最重要的人…你自己么？抛去自大狂妄，你爱现在的自己么？