Picking the right font for your email,presentation,or friendly notice stuck on the office wall can be head-aching.


Fonts come in all shapes and sizes and colours. But that doesn't mean you're allowed to go mad and use just ANY font though: these ones are banned.


Step 1: Arial
Arial's been around so long, now, that it's comforting and familiar in the same way that makes middle-aged men trade in their wives for a younger, sexier model. Arial is therefore the pixel equivalent of a frumpy, disappointing housewife


Step 2: Times New Roman
Times New Roman is rarely appropriate in a futuristic web2.0-enabled society. It's clumsy, and has weird ugly sharp twisty bits coming off each of the letters. Pick something properly classy like Verdana or Calibri, and let Times die.

在web2.0风靡的时代,Times New Roman这种字体已经不大适合用了。这种字体显得有些粗陋,每个字母都有很锐利的扭曲,显得怪怪的,很难看。选用一些漂亮的字体吧,比如Verdana or Calibri,让Times回家吃饭吧!

Step 3: Papyrus
Papyrus makes everything you type look like it was written in Ancient Greece!, albeit by a ROBOT FROM THE FUTURE.


If you're using it, why not go whole hog and flip the colour to green and write “Save the trees! Please don't print this e-mail unless you really need to...” in your email signature like any of your emails are worth printing off.

如果你在使用这个字体,那一不做二不休,干脆字体颜色选成绿色,然后在你的e-mail下方签名中写“Save the trees! Please don't print this e-mail unless you really need to...”(爱护树木,人人有责!除非确实需要,否则请勿打印此邮件。),这样一来,好像你的每封邮件都具有打印价值了一样。

Step 4: Comic Sans
The granddaddy of all unusable fonts. Initially intended to be a quick comic book substitute, Comic Sans quickly found itself overused to the point of eye-bleeding saturation, and is now rarely seen outside the realm of ignorant office notes.

在不能使用的字体中,这是爷字辈的人物。最初,人们设计Comic Sans字体,是为了让其快速在连环画册中抢占一席之地,成为其专用字体。但很快,人们便发觉,这个字体被随处滥用,已经引起人的视觉疲劳了。如今,除了在办公室里,人们还用它写写没人关注的通知外,在其他领域,这种字体已经销声匿迹了。

Step 5: Curlz
“Look at me!”, this font says. “Look at how what I write perfectly embodies the sort of person I am! I'm a bit crazy, and a bit different. I stand out!”


It doesn't matter that you can't actually read what they're writing, because the sort of person that chooses a nonsense font like this invariably hasn't got anything important to say anyway.


TRUE STORY: the email invite to last year's VideoJug Christmas Party was written entirely in red and green ‘Curlz' and the entire office was sick blood.


In short: be careful about which fonts you use, because the wrong one makes you look like a proper wally.