1.Leonard, these rental tuxedos have been worn by hundreds of sweaty strangers. I don’t like my own sweat touching my skin. How do you think I feel about theirs?
莱纳德，这些租赁的礼服早已被上百个满身臭汗的陌生人穿过。我连沾到自己的汗都讨厌，陌生人的汗不是更要命吗？

2.I must say I was surprised that you chose to spend our date night in the apartment. As I mentioned, the Pasadena City Council is debating longer crosswalk times, and later the Lego store is having a Midnight Madness sale. You ask anyone: that’s a hot date.
我不得不说我真没想到你会选择在家里度过我们的约会之夜。正如我提到的，帕萨迪纳市议会正在辩论加长行人过马路的时间，而且乐高专卖店午夜还会举行疯狂大甩卖。任谁都觉得那样的约会更血脉喷张。

3.I love Strawberry Quik! It’s my favorite pink fluid, narrowly beating out Pepto Bismol.
我超爱草莓速溶奶！我最喜欢的粉色液体，比佩托比斯摩（粉色液体胃药）略胜一筹。

4.Remarkable. In just under a half hour, two hundred metric tons of fuel will ignite in a controlled explosion right beneath Howard’s keister. And all from a country whose entire contribution to the global economy is Tetris and mail order brides.
太震撼了。在半小时后，霍华德屁股的正下方将有两百公吨燃料被定时爆炸装置点燃。全都由一个对世界经济的唯一贡献只有俄罗斯方块和邮购新娘的国度所准备。

5.This comic book in this condition is worth at least $100. I bought you and Bernadette a gravy boat worth $88. Which places me in your debt, and I can’t be in your debt, because someday you may ask me to help you to move, or kill a man.
状态良好的这本漫画现在至少值100块钱呢。我送给你和贝纳黛特的船行调味壶才88块。这样就变成我欠你的了，而我不想欠你，因为哪天你可能会让我帮忙搬家，或帮你去杀人。

6.The need to find another human being to share one’s life with has always puzzled me. Maybe because I’m so interesting all by myself. With that being said, may you find as much happiness with each other as I find on my own.
人穷尽一生追寻另一个人类共度一生的事，我一直无法理解。或许我自己太有意思，无需他人陪伴。所以，我祝福你们在对方身上得到的快乐与我给自己的一样多。