Our juggles are essentially built from relationships─with our partners, children, coworkers and friends. Effective communication is the grease that keeps our busy lives in gear. We need to be able to get our feelings and messages across to those with whom we live, work and love. When that doesn't happen, our relationships and schedules can go way out of whack, sometimes irreparably.

In today's Bonds column, my colleague Elizabeth Bernstein looks at how men and women communicate differently with their friends and with each other. Do women tend to over-share? Do men often keep their feelings bottled up inside? Are those habits harmful to emotional health and to relationships?
我的同事伊丽莎白•伯恩斯坦(Elizabeth Bernstein)曾在专栏中讨论了男性和女性在与朋友交流,以及两性间彼此沟通上的不同。女性是否过于热衷于分享?男性们是否常常把感觉埋在心里?这些习惯对心理健康和两性关系有什么坏处吗?

Yes, writes Ms. Bernstein. Relationship experts say that it might help for men to 'reveal more to others outside the relationship─and for women to zip it a bit more.' Some men keep their emotions so pent up that they eventually burst in an unhealthy fit of anger or alienate their partners or friends. Women, meanwhile, might find that obsessively talking and fretting over issues, known as 'co-rumination,' can lead to emotional difficulties, including depression and anxiety.

There are deeply rooted reasons why men and women communicate differently with their partners and friends. Many men, raised from infancy to be strong, are fearful of appearing vulnerable, scared or needy. Women, on the other hand, are often taught that it's OK to be emotional.