One big rule of dissertation writing - never discuss your progress with friends. David Ellis explores some of the big lessons you'll learn as you write
论文写作的一个大原则就是别和朋友讨论你的进度（永远别问一个学生论文写得怎么样了，好桑感）。大卫·埃利斯在此文中探讨了学生在写论文的过程会学到的一些重要心得以及教训。

All hail the dissertation. While they’re painful, prickly things with a bad habit of growing to alarming lengths, they teach some of the finest lessons one could hope to learn.
论文万岁！尽管论文这东西让人痛苦又棘手，并且总长得惊人，却能教会一个人所能期待的最好的东西。

Below are some of these lessons that anyone tackling one - both this year and next - should be prepared for.
以下是一些经验之谈，不论是今年还是未来要写论文的各位，都应该为此做好准备。

You are not as interesting as you’ve always secretly hoped.
你并不像自己常私下希望的那样有趣。

None of us are. Early on, all a dissertation demands is a unique idea, wherein your brain will likely think something along the lines of “An original thought. That can’t be too hard, the library must be full of them.” And even that isn’t new – Stephen Fry said it first.
我们每个人都不是。早年， 论文所要求的无非是一个独一无二的观点，因此你的大脑很可能会围绕着“要有一个原创性的观点，这不会太困难，图书馆有的是。”这种想法进行思考，不过连这句话也不再是原创的了—斯蒂芬·弗瑞已经第一个讲过了。

Discovering an uncovered topic is a deceptively difficult task. Inspiration is unlikely to strike you as you run the corridor, late, toward your tutor’s office for a first meeting.
找到一个未被涉足的课题是一项艰巨得唬人的任务。当你快迟到了，奔跑在走廊去导师办公室开第一次会的时候，不大可能会突发灵感。

Spend some serious time turning ideas over in your mind and note them all down for later consideration. Have a list and be prepared for many to be struck off because they’ve already been done– after all, even the metaphysical possibility of unicorns has been analysed before.
花点时间认真思考几个点子并把它们记下来做后续思考。列一个清单，做好很多题目会被毙掉的准备，因为很多想法都已经被别人做过——毕竟连“独角兽的超自然可能性”这样诡异的话题都已经被人研究过了。

It's impossible to fake what you don’t like over 10,000 words.
不大可能用一万多字捏造出你并不喜欢的东西。

One simply doesn’t have the stamina. Consider your course thus far and pinpoint whatever engaged you most thoroughly, whatever held your attention the longest and whatever you chiefly enjoyed.
确实很难有那样的耐力。仔细回忆一下你学过的课程，找出最让你感兴趣的，最长时间吸引你注意力的和最让你乐在其中的课题。

It isn’t about picking the most ‘profound’ subject (see Unicorns, above) . If a topic bores you, it’s unlikely you will produce anything particularly gripping. The best writing is pared down, not padded out: enjoy something and your brain will hum merrily, churning out sentences. If it is shut down through disinterest, every word will be a painful extraction.
并不是说要选一个最“深奥”的主题（见上文独角兽的课题）。如果选的课题让你厌烦，你不大可能做出吸引人的成果。最好的文章是删减修改出来的，而非东拼西凑出来的：享受喜欢的东西，你的大脑就会变得活跃，写论文时就会文思泉涌。如果因为不感兴趣而没法进行下去，那么绞尽脑汁写一个字都是痛苦。

Accept that this is a huge volume of work which will bore other people, and will quickly become insignificant, despite all the effort you go through to produce it.
接受事实：这是一项浩瀚的工作，其他人可能会为此厌倦。你所做的很快就会失去其意义，尽管你曾在这过程中花费无数精力。

You will never be able to draw a crowd beginning a story with ‘One time, writing my dissertation…’ A dissertation is a personal hell to be suffered in silence. If someone asks you more about it, the polite thing to do is change the subject.
你绝不会用一个以“有次，我在写论文”开头的故事来博得别人眼球。写论文是你要一个人默默被地狱历练的过程。如果有人问你过多相关的问题，最礼貌的做法就是转移话题 。

This will not be the last piece of demanding work like this.
像这样费力的工作绝不是最后一件。

Writing is difficult.
论文写作绝非易事。

There are no literary oils to make your arguments fluid or your ideas glisten. Amazon don’t deliver good sentences on demand. You will be unhappy with what you write and it will need correction – make enough time to do this.
没有什么“写作万金油”能让你的论据变得流畅，让你的观点闪耀起来。亚马逊不会按照你的要求邮递好句子给你。你会对自己所写的感到不满意，修改是不可避免的——记得给自己足够多的时间来修改。

Remember, these are your ideas and they should be in your words: while appropriate use of technical language is a must, there’s no reason to draft sentences like you’re a 16th century playwright.
记住，论文中都是你的观点，而且要用你自己的语言来表达：尽管有时适当使用专业术语非常必要，但也没有理由把句子写得好像你是16世纪的剧作家似的。

Write as you speak – so long as you speak well. And if you don’t, start to. Say what you mean and correct yourself when you don’t: if you mean ‘regularly’, don’t say ‘often’; never confuse ‘less’ and ‘fewer’; ‘credulity’ and ‘credibility’ are not interchangeable.
像讲话一样写文章——只要你讲话讲得好。如果你说得并不好，那就开始练习。 把你真正想表达的意思说出来，没说对再更正：如果你想表达“通常”，那就别说“经常”；别把“少量的”和“较少的”搞混了；“轻信”和“可信”是不可互换的。

It sounds peevish to say so, but if you can train your brain to think clearly, writing will become easier and what you produce will be better.
这样说听起来有些矫情，但如果你能训练自己的大脑清晰地思考，写作会变得更加容易，你写出来的东西也会更棒。

A dissertation is consuming.
论文的完成需要多方帮助。

You will get too close to it and miss your own mistakes. Only another person can identify flaws in logic, holes in analysis and so forth, which means it’s vital to pair with the appropriate supervisor.
你会太过于投入以至于忽略自己的错误。只有其他人能发现逻辑上的瑕疵和分析漏洞等等，这意味着找一位合适的导师是十分关键的。

Spend time on this, people don’t always suit each other. If there isn’t anyone to invigorate your research, challenge your thoughts and question the validity of your arguments, there may as well be no one at all. Be sure to choose someone with enough time to be able to assist.
花点时间去寻找合适的导师，并不是人人都适合。如果没有谁等激发你的研究兴趣，挑战你的想法和质疑你论据的可靠性，那还不如没有导师。一定要选一位有足够时间来帮助你的人。

Never justify your subject choice to a tutor or supervisor by saying you have an ‘overwhelming passion’ for it.
别以你“异常喜欢”某个课题的方式来向你的导师证明你的选题。

At worst, you’ll be lying and at best you’ll come across as if you have a very peculiar fetish.
最坏的情况是，你根本就是在撒谎；或者至多你当时是有特殊的迷恋。

You will resent the internet and every distraction on it.
你会讨厌网络和任何让你分神的东西。

Contrary to American sitcoms, and all your dreams, work trumps your social life sometimes.
 
与美国情景喜剧和你梦想的相反，工作有时是排在社交生活前面的。

Do what you can as early as possible because when the deadline cruelly beckons, the simplest of things – a date, other work, eating, breathing – becomes a disastrous interruption. Never compare your progress with friends: one of you will always feel nauseous afterwards.
尽可能早的把你能做的做了，因为当截止日期残酷地到来时，哪怕最简单的事—一个约会，其他工作，吃东西，休息——都可能灾难性地中断你的进程 。绝不要和朋友比拼进度：事后你们当中总会有人厌恶这样的选择。

Remember these lessons, rather than learn them the hard way – and find that idea quickly. And if you’re at the stage you’re meant to be writing the damned thing, go! Shoo! You’re procrastinating again.
记住这些经验之谈，就不用以身试法来痛苦地得到教训了，不过也要迅速找到论文主题。如果你正是在要写那该死的论文的阶段，快快动手！千万别再拖延了！

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