10.小偷和击剑冠军的偶遇

In Budapest, Hungary a burglar came face-to-face with a sword-wielding Virgine Ujlaky (pictured) who happened to be practicing near the house he was burgling. Pal Nagy had climbed a fence and was attempting to climb in through a back window when Ujlaky confronted him. She pinned the burglar to the wall with the point of her sword pointed at his neck and calmly called the police. When the police came to collect the man, he was in such a state of shock that he had to be treated by paramedics!
在匈牙利的首都布达佩斯一个歹徒在偷窃的过程中遭遇了正在附近训练的国家击剑运动员Virgine Ujlaky(上图)。这个歹徒当时已经爬过了围栏企图通过房子后面的窗户进入别人家里进行偷盗结果遇上了Virgine Ujlaky。她用自己的击剑将罪犯定在了墙边然后镇定的叫了警察。而当警察迅速赶来抓罪犯的时候,罪犯的状况非常让人震惊,因为他已经需要医护服务了。

9.工作时间禁止饮酒

In Dusseldorf, Germany a criminal was proud of himself for having successfully stolen money and jewellery. He decided to treat himself to some stolen champagne in the comfort of his getaway car. He got so drunk though that he fell asleep. Concerned passers-by thought the poor man had passed out and was trapped in his vehicle so called the emergency services. When the police turned up, they checked his ID and discovered he’d been a naughty 37-year-old boy and was wanted for a string of robberies. As well as the robberies, he was also charged with drink-driving.
在德国的杜塞尔多夫一个罪犯正在得意自己成功偷到了钱和珠宝。然后他打算在自己舒适的偷来的车里喝一点偷来的香槟。但是他喝太多了以至于醉翻了。周遭关切的人们以为这个倒霉的家伙昏过去被困在车里了,然后叫来了警察。当警察过来检查了他的身份证,发现他是一个37岁的捣蛋鬼,而且还因为一系列的偷盗行为正在被通缉。跟偷盗罪同时,这个罪犯还被起诉了醉驾。

8.偷车去受审

A 37-year-old man is due in court for an auto theft crime he committed. He shows up on the day, which was nice of him to do so. He showed up, however, in a stolen Lexus SUV. Police in the carpark were suspicious as they watched the hairstylist by day turn up, exit the car and enter the courthouse…leaving some Yorkshire Terriers yapping away in the vehicle. Their suspicions paid off because soon the San Francisco based criminal as charged with receiving a stolen vehicle, receiving stolen property and charges of animal cruelty for leaving the dogs unattended in the vehicle. And what happened in the courthouse? the jury convicted the man of the original auto theft charge. He was charged with possession of a Porsche Carrera, valued at $125,000, that had been stolen from a San Anselmo home.
一个37岁哥们儿即将去法庭接受自己以前关于偷车的审判。他按时出现了,这对于他来说很好。但是他竟然开着一辆偷来的雷克萨斯去接受审判。停车场里的警察看着这位发型师开车来了,然后离开车进入了法院,任由车里的几只Yorkshire小狗对他狂吠。很快警方的怀疑验证了,这个旧金山来的罪犯被指控为买脏和置小狗在车内于不顾涉嫌虐宠。那么在法庭里发生了什么呢?在法庭里他因为盗车被指控,被偷掉的车价值12.5万美元,来自于圣地亚哥。

7.自作自受

A man from Michigan stole $300 worth of hunting knives, which he hid in his pants. As he ran away from the store he tripped, fell and stabbed himself in the stomach by the knives that were tucked away in the waistline of his getaway pants. That is what they call Karma. The suspect was hospitalised after the attempted theft from a Meijer Inc. superstore in the US city of Grand Rapids and is expected to face a misdemeanor shoplifting charge.
一个哥们儿偷了一把价值300美元的狩猎刀藏在他自己的裤子里。在逃跑的过程中他偷来的刀从腰间滑落在地上,而与此同时他被绊倒,偷来的刀子戳进了他的胃部。这就是人们说的命运吧。在他在美国的大激流城的Meijer超市偷窃之后,这个小偷被送往医院,而且会面对一个偷窃的起诉。

6.小偷大战95岁老太太

That’s right folks, 46-year-old robber Robert Horsley (pictured) came face-to-face against a 95-year-old woman a wheelchair armed with a screwdriver when he broke into her home in the middle of the night. Making more noise than a bull in a china shop when trying to break in through the front door, as soon as Horsley got his hand through the broken glass to unlock the door the elderly lady stabbed it. By this point Horsley was making even more noise. Alarming the neighbours, who called the police, he was soon arrested and is now in jail facing one count of first-degree burglary.
没错,46岁的强盗罗伯特霍斯里面对坐在轮椅上的手中握着一把螺丝刀的95岁老太太,事发当时还是半夜。这哥们一边造成巨大的声响,一边玩儿命的撬着老太太家的前门,就在他终于把玻璃撬开伸手进去把门打开的时候老太太果断出手用螺丝刀猛戳了他的手。随即罗伯特发出了比敲门声还大的惨叫声惊醒了邻居,邻居们迅速叫来了警察,之后罗伯特被逮捕并且面对一项一级抢劫罪的指控。

5.请签名~

In Stockport, UK an 18-year-old burglar was arrested for vandalizing a children’s campsite building. The mastermind, known as Peter Addison, and his friend Mark Ridgeway let off fire extinguishers and smashed crockery. How did the police capture this clever little criminal? He scrawled his name across the wall above this poster. Not only did he show his level of IQ by doing this but he also proved his maturity after he also wrote “R GAY” after British Garden Birds on the poster.
在英国的斯托克波特,一个18岁的歹徒因为破坏小孩的露营地建筑而被逮捕。这两个叫做Peter Addison和Mark Ridgeway的破坏活动策划者放空了灭火器,打碎了所有瓷器。那警察是怎么抓到这两位大师的呢?他们其中一人竟然在墙上的海报上写下了自己名字。这还不止,最让人怀疑他们智商的地方是,他们还在海报上的“英国园艺鸟”后面写上了“是同性恋”的留言。

4.呃,柜台里有多少钱?

A 40-year-old bank robbing virgin it seems. In 2008 Daniel Glen planned to rob a convenience store in Windsor, Ontario, USA. Planning was his forte, robbing was not. Glen phoned the store in advance to ask how much money was in the cash register. The clerk called the police right after he got off the phone and the cops arrested Glen as he was making his way to the store. Turns out Glen was a suspect for two other similar incidents in which he phoned a store in advance and asked the clerk’s to have the money bagged and ready for his arrival. Genius.
一个40岁的抢银行新手。2008年丹尼尔格兰计划去抢劫一个位于美国安大略湖温莎的便利店。很显然,做计划是他的强项,但是抢劫本身貌似不是。格兰在抢劫之前打电话询问柜员超市里的柜台有多少现金。柜员在接完他的电话后立即就通知了警察,之后警察在格兰前往超市的路上把他抓获。随后证实格兰同时还是另外两起未遂抢劫案的嫌疑人,和这一次一样,格兰在前两次也是事先通知了超市的柜员告诉他们把钱包好等他来拿。果真是天才!

3.装死也是艺术

If you are ever confronted by a brown bear you should play dead, not if you are being chased by police. It seems no one told this to a burglar who broke into a funeral home in Burjassot, outside Valencia in an effort to evade capture from the cops. Among the open caskets holding the dead it did not take long for the suspect to be found. Firstly, he was the only dead person breathing. Secondly, he was wearing baggy, grungy clothes unlike the suits the rest of the deceased were wearing.
如果你在野外不幸遇到了野熊你应该迅速装死以期逃过一劫,但是当你遭遇警察的时候,这显然是行不通的。不过很显然没有人把这个常识告诉这位劫匪,这位哥们儿在西班牙的巴伦西亚企图破门进入一个殡仪馆,随后他又企图躲进棺材装死能够逃脱追捕。当然在众多的打开的棺材当中警察没有花太多的时间就把他逮了出来。很显然,第一他是唯一个死了还在呼吸的人。其次,他穿着邋遢宽松的衣服,而这和大多死者所穿的套装很不相符。

2.空手道大师与小偷的故事

The Pan-American karate champion Cristian Garces lives in Manizales, Colombia, along with his instructors and fellow karate peers. Manizales, Colombia is also home to one very stupid burglar who decided that breaking into Garces’ house, whilst the man was inside along with all his karate chums, was a sensible idea. You can pretty much guess the rest…he was “apprehended” until police arrived to arrest him.
全美空手道冠军Cristian Garces住在哥伦比亚的马尼萨莱斯,和他一起在马尼萨莱斯的还有他的教练和他的同行们。当然马尼萨莱斯同样是也是一个蠢到家的劫匪的故乡,而这个劫匪打算冲进Garces的家里抢劫,而且是在Garces和他的同行好友们聚会的时候,这确实是一个不错的主意。当然随后所发生的时候你基本也能猜到了,这位劫匪一直处在被“擒获”状态,直到警察来押走他。

1.不好意思,银行打烊了

Dozy bank robber Christopher Allen Koch was arrested in Liberty, Pennsylvania, USA after he tried to rob a bank that had already closed for the day. The 28-year-old ciminal arrived at Citizens & Northern Bank at 11.40am and sat inside his car in the bank’s parking lot for 20 minutes. No doubt he was trying to psyche himself up for what would become the heist of the century. Koch failed to notice the opening hours though. The bank shut at 12pm; Koch made his move at 12:01pm. Staff inside saw the criminal stood outside the locked entrance doors with a ski mask on and a gun in his hand. They were obviously smarter than him though because they managed to note down his vehicle’s license plate number. Police tracked him down and Koch was charged with criminal attempted robbery and possessing instruments of a crime.
美国宾夕法尼亚州的蠢蛋劫匪Christopher Koch可以说是自首的,因为他企图去抢劫一家已经关门了的银行。这位28岁的劫匪在11点40分到达北部居民银行,然后在银行的停车场里待了20分钟。毫无疑问这20分钟他一定是在给自己之后的万世基业加油鼓劲。但是Koch却没有注意到银行的营业时间只到中午。Koch在12点01分的时候鼓足勇气开始行动。银行内部的员工注意到这位劫匪站在已经关闭的正门入口带着滑雪面罩手持一把枪。显然雇员们比这劫匪聪明,他们记下了劫匪汽车的车牌号。警察很快就跟踪到了Koch,然后Koch被以企图抢劫未遂和持有犯罪武器罪起诉。